I’m mostly a shy, softly-spoken person who prefers to avoid getting much attention at parties and functions. I don’t drink much and if it wasn’t for my embarrassing problem, I think I would cope quite well in social situations.
My problem is that I have very strong views on politics and economics, and if either of these topics is even vaguely referred to in a conversation, it triggers something inside of me and I react very passionately. Actually, passionately is a nice way of putting it. I can be downright offensive and confrontational and it scares people, even me, because I don’t feel in control of what I’m saying.
I’m still recovering from a work party a few months ago when I shouted down my boss’s wife, calling her a capitalist pig because I heard her complaining about her taxes going to public schools when her kids went to private ones. I’m lucky I didn’t lose my job! More recently I got into a heated argument with an economist about “sustainable” economic growth (which got me thrown out of a pub) and just yesterday, I was rude to one of my customers who couldn’t stop going on and on about the useless government (I told him he should stop whining and do something about it instead). These are just a few examples.
Following the boss’s wife incident, I have been in counseling and I am currently practicing several meditation techniques to help calm my mind. Nothing seems to be working, and if anything I only seem to be getting worse. Can you help me to control my outbursts, or at least to respond in a more civilized way?
I suspect that your brain is being inhabited by a juvenile spark. You will have to be understanding and forgive your spark for their lack of tact. It is just a learner, who is probably still a bit impatient, but if you are able to nurture and respect your spark, it will stick around. And with time, it will mature and become an inspirational source of wisdom to you.
What on earth is a spark, you may be asking? Well, sparks are not from this Earth, but are able to inhabit it, and often choose to reside temporarily in the frontal lobes of human brains. Their reasons for doing so are explained in more detail in the ‘Who is the Spark’ page of The Inkling website. I suggest you educate yourself by reading this, since you are most likely going to be influenced by your spark, and it is in your best interests to accept and work in partnership with your new resident, rather than fighting it.
In short, your spark is using your physical capabilities to interact and participate in the tangible, material world. Your spark has direct contact with a much greater universal consciousness, and therefore can see things that average, non-spark inhabited human brains can’t see or perceive. Your spark is using you as a mouthpiece to communicate important messages and to initiate necessary action. Your role here is to receive and broadcast these messages. You will also need to do some physical ‘work’ from time to time (this could be through creative, inventive, or organizational projects) and be open to connections with other spark-inhabited human beings.
My advice to you, at this stage, is to become more aware of your spark and to pay attention to what it is trying to communicate. When you have a clear picture of what needs to be said or done, direct this inspiration or passion into a worthwhile project that will gain respect and credibility amongst your fellow humans. What are your natural talents? Use them to carry this message. Try to avoid wasting your passion on your boss’s wife or individual members of the public. Aim for bigger, more influential targets, but start where you can, and take small steps to begin with. Don’t worry too much about the bigger plan or taking on ambitious projects on your own. Your spark will guide you, you just need to trust it and allow it to lead you into the path of the people and situations that require you. Make friends with your spark. Embrace it, don’t fight it, and good luck to you both.